Zingers, Zhrapnel, and Zicochets

Bart delivers a four-liner in the Maverick episode 'Destination Devil's Flat'—
Sheriff Trevor: "As for you, freeloader—I better not ever find you in this town again."
Bart: "Sheriff, I've met men that I've respected and liked.
And men that I've liked and didn't respect.
And men that I didn't like but had respect for.
There's one other combination that just about sums up my feelings for you."

Lee Marvin (Fardan) gets the best line over Ralph Bellamy (Grant) in The Professionals—
Grant: "You bastard!"
Fardan: "Yes, sir. In my case, an accident of birth. But you, sir, you're a self-made man."

In the Gunsmoke radio episode 'The Wake,' Matt and Chester talking about Mrs. Boggs—
Matt: "She's hiding something."
Chester: "Too bad it ain't her face."

Chester talking to a dirty ugly slob of a prisoner in 'Shooting Stopover'—
"Well, Gurney, you kinda look like the dogs had you under the house!"

In the March 30, 1958 episode of Luke Slaughter of Tombstone,
Luke searching for the baddies in the saloons:
"They weren't in the Oriental or the Occidental."

In the April 20, 1958 episode of Luke Slaughter of Tombstone,
Wichita says of an Easterner:
"He was as happy as a chipmunk in a piñon forest."

In the Bronco episode 'Tangled Trail,' a rancher's daughter tries to get Bronco's attention—
"Do you like to ride? I love to ride early in the morning when it's just getting pink in the East."

Jude Pilchuk (Raymond Hatton) in The Thundering Herd,
tending to a shot and beaten Tom Doan (Randolph Scott)—
"It's the hand of Providence! Saved him from gettin' married before he's old enough to know better."

In the Gunsmoke radio episode 'Hinka-Do,' Matt meets Miss Mamie—
Matt: "I was just wonderin' how you were gettin' along, Miss Mamie."
Miss Mamie: "Like a kid with two tongues on an all-day sucker."